The Ten Commandments: A Call to Relationship, Not Religion

For many people, the Ten Commandments bring to mind rules, restrictions, and a demanding God who lays down the law with an iron fist. They might feel like a checklist of dos and don’ts—a rigid standard that we can never quite live up to. But what if we have misunderstood them? What if the Ten Commandments were never about imprisoning us under religious obligations but instead were meant to set us free?

God never intended His commandments to be a burden. They were given within the context of relationship. Before He asked anything of His people, He had already rescued them, already claimed them as His own. The Ten Commandments were never about earning His love—they were given as an expression of it.

A Covenant Before the Commandments

To truly grasp the significance of the Ten Commandments, we must first understand the covenant God made with His people. A covenant is not just a contract or an agreement—it is a binding, relational promise. Unlike human contracts, which can be broken if one party fails to hold up their end, a covenant with God is different. It is built on His faithfulness, not ours.

Long before the commandments were given, God had already chosen Israel as His people. He made a covenant with Abraham, promising to bless him and his descendants.

I will establish my covenant between me and you and your offspring after you throughout their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be God to you and to your offspring after you. (Genesis 17:7 ESV)

This covenant was not based on Israel’s obedience but on God’s unwavering love. Even when Israel failed, God remained faithful to His promise. He later reaffirmed this covenant at Mount Sinai, reminding the Israelites that their relationship with Him came first.

I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery. (Exodus 20:2 ESV)

This is crucial—before giving a single command, God reminded His people of what He had already done. He had rescued them, chosen them, and established a relationship with them. The commandments were never about earning God’s love or salvation; they were a response to the covenant that had already been made.

God’s Covenant Is Unbreakable

One of the most beautiful truths in Scripture is that God never breaks His covenant. While Israel often turned away from Him, breaking the commandments and running after other gods, He never abandoned them. He spoke through the prophet Jeremiah, saying:

I will never break my covenant with you. (Judges 2:1 ESV)

Even when Israel’s disobedience led to exile and suffering, God remained faithful. He promised a new covenant, one that would be written on their hearts, fulfilled through Jesus Christ.

For this is the covenant that I will make with the house of Israel after those days, declares the Lord: I will put my law within them, and I will write it on their hearts. And I will be their God, and they shall be my people. (Jeremiah 31:33 ESV)

This new covenant, fulfilled in Christ, does not abolish the commandments but completes them. Through Jesus, the law is no longer something written on stone tablets—it is written on our hearts through the Holy Spirit.

Relationship Came Before the Rules

Because of God’s covenant, relationship came before the rules. This is completely different from how religion often works. Many people believe that if they follow the rules well enough, then God will accept them. But the gospel turns that upside down. The Israelites did not obey God to become His people; they obeyed because they already were His people.

This truth is just as important for us today. We do not follow God's commands to earn His love. We obey because we have already been loved.

The Commandments Were Given to Set Us Free

Many people assume that freedom means living without rules. But true freedom is not the absence of boundaries—it is living within the right ones. A fish might believe it is confined by the water, but the moment it jumps out, it begins to die. It was created for the water. In the same way, we were created to live in obedience to God, and His commandments are not barriers to joy but the very path to it.

Each of the Ten Commandments reflects God’s love and wisdom.

• You shall have no other gods before me, because nothing else will ever satisfy you like I can.

• You shall not make for yourself a carved image, because I am greater than anything you could create or imagine.

• You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, because My name is powerful, and it is meant to be honored.

• Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy, because you were not made to work yourself to exhaustion; rest is My gift to you.

• Honor your father and your mother, because family and respect matter.

• You shall not murder, because every life is sacred.

• You shall not commit adultery, because faithfulness leads to deeper love and trust.

• You shall not steal, because living with integrity builds a just and peaceful society.

• You shall not bear false witness, because truth brings freedom, and lies destroy.

• You shall not covet, because contentment leads to joy, and comparison only breeds bitterness.

These commandments are not about control; they are about care. They show us how to live in harmony with God and one another.

Legalism vs. the Heart of Obedience

I remember a conversation where someone was debating whether eating fish on Fridays during Lent was truly fasting since fish technically isn’t meat. They were so caught up in the technicality that they lost sight of the real purpose behind fasting—drawing closer to God.

It made me reflect on how often we turn obedience into legalism. We focus on the external details while missing the heart behind it. Jesus constantly rebuked the Pharisees for this very thing.

You leave the commandment of God and hold to the tradition of men. (Mark 7:8 ESV)

God cares far more about why we obey than how perfectly we follow the rules. When we turn obedience into a rigid checklist, we miss the point. But when we obey out of love and devotion, it draws us closer to God.

Jesus and the Heart of the Law

When Jesus was asked which commandment was the greatest, He summarized the entire law in two simple truths.

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets. (Matthew 22:37-40 ESV)

The commandments were never about legalism. They were about love. Love for God and love for others.

What If You Stopped Striving and Started Receiving

God is not asking you to clean yourself up before coming to Him. He already made the way. He already chose you.

Will you say yes?

A Prayer of Surrender

Father, I have spent too much time trying to earn what You have already given—Your love, Your grace, and Your freedom. I have made Your commandments into a checklist instead of seeing them as a gift. Help me to trust that Your ways are good. Help me to see that every boundary You have given is rooted in love. Draw me into a deeper relationship with You, where my obedience flows from love, not fear. I surrender my striving, my doubts, and my resistance. Teach me to walk in the freedom You designed for me. I choose You, Lord. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

The Ten Commandments were never about religion. They were about relationship. And God is still inviting you into that relationship today. Will you accept His invitation?